All it is is a simple circle. That's what I started with. After hundreds and hundreds of pages of the psychiatry texts of my training, hardly ever were Personal Boundaries even mentioned. And yet they are the most powerful force (beyond our passions), and one of the only forces that make us HUMAN (as opposed to advanced animals.)

If the passions of the "Reptilian Brain" I always talk about were like an "accelerator pedal on your life, then the Personal Boundary is your "brake pedal."

One of the frequent questions we receive at WomensHappiness.com goes like this: "Any thoughts on how to deal with a player? I feel really stupid because I thought we were connecting emotionally, and now I just feel really hurt. His other girlfriend showed up while I was with him. I think he revels in the attention he gets from more than one woman. There is no commitment, but I want him to know that I'm the kind of woman who wants to be respected. How do I let him know that?"

We usually hear about the importance of resolving arguments with empathy and perspective for the other person described as "there are two sides to every coin," or "what would it be like if the shoe was on the other foot?" What about thinking about the shoe itself in that metaphor? Today we have a pretty flawless, thorough way to look at the process of forgiving a man who's (maybe) done you wrong, and a way to really amplify your own gains in personal growth in the process. I call it, "The Five Shoes" to forgiving a man.